Mimi

Today marked the end of my first week back to school. It was actually painless and rather productive. Who knew? I really like my team this year. We have a couple of new members, and the team dynamic is working well so far. One of my favorite teaching partners is our Chinese teacher, Mimi. She is our Chinese teacher in that she TEACHES Chinese and in that she is actually FROM China. She speaks GREAT Chinese, and her English is...well...better than my Chinese. She always calls me by my last name, or I should say...by the Chinese version of my last name which is apparently "Lechinja". It cracks me up EVERY TIME.

Mimi and I were roommates last year in Japan. Pause and reflect on that for just a moment, and consider that Mimi's limited English prevents her from understanding sarcasm. She left Japan more convinced than ever that I am absolutely nuts. If I had a nickel for every time I heard, "Lechinja, you crazy", I might have just enough to buy a scoop of green tea ice cream...which I DO NOT recommend unless you're buying it in the states where we add enough sugar to make it tolerable.

But, I digress...

For whatever reason, Mimi is one of my biggest fans. I think it's because I'm from Texas. Regardless, I like to spend as much time as possible in her classroom. What can I say? I'm desperate. I live in a state where people don't understand the art of telling you what you want to hear. Yesterday, she said something along the lines of, "Lechinja, I think you lose five to seven pounds since May." I thanked her profusely but then assured her that I keep close tabs on such things and this was absolutely not the case." I went on and on about the gallons of Blue Bell I consumed while in Texas and about my tacos al carbon with queso from Pappasitos. But, she was insistent.

She then went on to say, "I think maybe you need to gain two pounds. I like your face to be round." At this point, I had to explain that I have never had the luxury of strategically placing excess weight on more advantageous body parts. Otherwise, I would have skinny legs and huge boobs. Still, I took Mimi's advice and decided to pick up a couple of extra pounds at the Dairy Queen that afternoon. I have been plagued with an intense desire to partake of the Girl Scout Cookie Thin Mint Blizzard since the first time I saw it on television, and I found this to be the perfect opportunity. I must say, it was good but definitely not worth the hype. I much prefer the Mint Oreo Blizzard. Even still, the Thin Mint Blizzard did the trick. I successfully relocated a couple of extra pounds that were, in fact, never lost. Unfortunately, my thighs are larger and my face is still not round. I guess I'll just have to keep trying.